Transitioning into Aromanticism as a Trans Student

Written by Amethyst (They/them/theirs - Ey/Em/Eir - She/her), guest contributor

Word count: 424 words
Estimated reading time: approx. 3 minutes


My experience with aromanticism has been, well, an intrepid journey of coming out and acceptance. I first came out as asexual in the 6th grade to my fellow thespians. I always knew that I was oddly different in a way of some kind; and, truth be told, I felt non-conforming in society. I could not express myself with my identity, until I learned about this fascinating terminology. I always knew that I was asexual; approximately at the age of 11, I learned the precise term. The way each identity is so intricately different from the next in the LGBTQIA2-SP+ is appealing to aromantics like me, who tend to be in a dilemma with multiple identities. The multiplicity is extreme with this terminology of aromanticism and asexual. I learned that I was arospec of some sort. At first I thought that I was greyromantic (grey aromantic) until I learned about aroflux, and after that I learned terms, such as arogender, dreadromantic, demiromantic, quioromantic, idemromantic etc… After learning this terminology and evaluating my identity, I did not feel as atypical. I was attempting to further understand my identity, until fantabulously, I found an identity that clicked (all while maintaining gender dysphoria). I had to educate myself with this terminology and interpret what I am. I also became nonbinary, genderqueer, genderfluid, xenogender, one after another. I learned that agender is me. I never knew that I would identify as a transfeminine agender aromantic asexual. I needed to learn, mix, and change my identities, and I encourage others to do so as well if they feel it’s right for them l. I currently identify as asexual, aromantic, agender, and agender (yes, my gender perhaps will change, although I extracted my gender from this dysphoria)! It may occasionally feel tedious to constantly change identities, orientations, and/or pronouns. I am not anxious with my current identity (I do not even have a sexuality!), and I could not have done it without acceptance and a diversifying environment. I want to spread a cultural mosaic. As Addison Rose at Break The Binary thinks, trans and nonbinary people have always existed across cultures. And, similar to Shamir from Inqueery, I know that my identity is included and accepted in Hinduism, Islam, and, my spirituality, Buddhism. I also want to acknowledge Blossom Brown, a transwoman and spiritual teacher, and my therapist. Everything and anything may be done with knowledge, and with that I will end with a quote from Mahatma Gandhi: “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.”

Papo Aromantic